Thursday, April 15, 2010

Summer Classes For Men

              Summer Classes for Men at
              THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

              REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
              by Monday April 28, 2008
              NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
              OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

              Class 1
              How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
              Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

              Class 2
              The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
              Round Table Discussion.
              Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

              Class 3
              Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
              Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
              Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

              Class 4
              Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The
              Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
              Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

              Class 5
              Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
              Examples on Video.
              Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
              at 7:00 PM

              Class 6
              Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
              Help Line Support and Support Groups.
              Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

              Class 7
              Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places
              And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
              Open Forum
              Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

              Class 8
              Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
              Graphics and Audio Tapes.
              Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

              Class 9
              Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
              Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

              Class 10
              Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
              Driving Simulations.
              4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

              Class 11
              Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
              Online Classes and role-playing
              Tuesdays at 7:00 PM , location to be determined

              Class 12
              How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
              Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
              Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

              Class 13
              How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries
              and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
              Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
              Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

              Class 14
              The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
              Live Demonstration.
              Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

              Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued
              to the survivors.

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