Sometimes I wish...
...that life were a little more like The Matrix. At least with respect to the thing they had were they could just plug it into your head and you would learn stuff. I don't really like learning, but I like knowing stuff. It would be so much easier to just plug in and BAM, I know all about astrophysics, or Mongol History, or I could play flawless guitar, or be able to do anything I really wanted! That would be stellar.
...that I could somehow stop my facial hair from growing in the places I don't want it. Like my neck.
...that I could magically make the hair on my head grow at an astonishing rate.
...I was a little bit taller. I wish I was a baller.
...I could speak Spanish.
...I could read faster.
...I could clone myself so I could be in two places at once and I wouldn't miss anything because of work.
...I could eat pizza for every meal.
...I wasn't so hairy.
...I could live in the woods away from all the distractions of the world. But with high speed internet.
...I quit my paper route a year earlier and tried out for the football team.
...I had found a way too keep playing hockey after age 12.
...I could go back and do high school over again because I am much cooler now.